Fishy

Master is not my oppa..
Its just a name he accepts but he does not accept the powers or benefits of an oppa
Its just a name to him
Today I wrote a message a long personal message...
I put masters email in. The box ready to send
But then I thought about it..he's not my oppa he doesn't want to hear about this
I did not thrash the email yet maybe ill send it to someone else xD
Its a bit hard getting used to the idea that no matter what master will be the last person I turn to..
He was always the first person so I feel a bit alone now I guess?
Master got mad when I seeked strangers for advice..
But does this mean I can ask strangers for advice now?
If its not bdsm related..I prob won't tell master
That is the mindset I am conditioning myself into..
It is going good so far I am pleased by my progress with conditioning
I hope that master is also pleased with conditioning
Yes he will learn less about me..and I guess maybe he will be the last to learn..
Would he be mad when everyone knows why kitty is upset?
Would he be sad when everyone knows why kitty is crying?
Would he be happy to know as a master he is being treated the way he deserves..
So many thoughts fluttering around
I just want to be the best slave I can be..