Doublez

I am proud of myself
I did good
Masters birthday week was Great! <3
Master, did not do as much as I did for him
But, on my birthday I felt a strong happiness..
It was in a short less then 30sec recording
but, I felt so happy, can't explain how happy
That happiness, I wanted to reach Master
Being his cuckquean, Ive already made him so happy
but I want to give him that unexplainable happiness..
the kind he can't explain ^_^
I think on a 1-10 scale I think I scored a 10 on giving happiness ^_^
YAYZ ^_^ I'M HAPPY
Happy and exhusted :D
My cuckquean cherry has been POPPED ^_^
WOOW
So this is what happend
Master messaged me a quick message
Fucky time, girl in club!
After he said that something weird happened...
I was super wet, wetter then usual it felt like I was dripping..
I look and i'm SOAKING wet ^_^ woahz
I've never been this wet before I guess their is a first time for everything ^.^
I started thinking about Master kissing this girl, passionatly I was jealous for a few seconds
But I came back to the realization, that I am happy that he can get kisses, and have sex, and be happy ^_^
My jealously turned in happiness, the more I thought about him fucking girls the happier I was and also more horny!
I woudve been 50x more horny and more happy watching :)
but anywayz
I was a bit sleepy, I drifted asleep smiling
Yay, While I sleep Master will cum over and over and over again, with a girl thats not me
Smiling I went to sleep..
I awoke a few hours later, my phone was vibrating I grabbed it and put it near my pussy
LOL I guess I thought I had a vibrator
it was Master calling...
I felt Happy going to sleep
I felt 10x more Happy when I found out Master was happy
I felt a happiness I can't explain
I loved this feeling
I wanna feel this happy everyday
I wish Master fucked girls more often

Begging

Please Master

Please hurt your slave Master

Fuck S hard and deep

Fuck her all night long, or all day long

As much as you desire

your slave will watch with desire and lust

Lust to be fucked

Lust to be denied

Please deny your slave, the ability to cum

Kitty wants to watch, paying close attention to your desires

Master, Please don't forget

Your cuckquean will wait patiently for you to tell her, when you need more cucksluts

As much as you want, Your slave will always find for you

1 cuckslut or 10 cucksluts, I will try my hardest to give you what you desire

If you don't desire me, but would rather someone else

Your cuckquean will smile, and present you with more cucksluts

But, Please Master your slave askes for one thing

Please Master, Please enjoy yourself to the fulllest

Dont Think about your cuckquean Kitty

Be selfish, and focous only on your pleasure

Kitty would give up her orgasams, if it ment Master could have more

Please Master, Please cuckquean Kitty to your desires

Chosing if Kitty should watch, or not to watch

Please Master, Please chose the best cuckquean options for you

Kitty wont complain

Kitty wants her Master to enjoy herself as much as he can

If those plans, don't involve kitty at all

Kitty still wishes the best regarding Masters orgasams

Please Master, Please mold me to be the cuckquean that you desire

No matter how much pain you cause Kitty

It won't hurt one bit

Please Master, please continue to hurt your slave

Your slave wishes for your pleasure

Your slave is like a fleshlight

Used for your pleasure, denied of her own

Please use your slave correctly, as a fleshlight

Master, Your slave wishes only one feeling from you

she wishes to feel your sadistic side

Please Master, Please unleash that hidden side of you

No matter how painful or how scary

Your Kitty wont be scared she will smile and beg for more pain

Please Master, Please hurt your slave

Hurt your slave by cuckquean or by whoring her out or even beatings

No matter how harsh the pain is, Kitty won't feel a thing

Please Master, Please mold me into your bimbo cuckquean

Mold me, and give me boobies as big as you desire

Make me the hyper sexual Bimbo that you desire

Please control, mold me as you desire

Please Master, Please also control one more thing

Please control my orgasams

Control them so I can give my body complelty to you

With you in control, Master truely is able to release his sadistic side

Master, Please control me

Master

Please Use, abuse, deny and control me as you see fit.

Your slave wants to do anything for your happiness

Please allow her to show you by serviture

In her serviture she wishes to show you, her true desires to be your slave

Please Master, Please allow kitty to take every opportunity to show you

Please Master, Please enjoy yourself on your first cuckquean expirence

This is one of the many ways your slave wishes to show you her servitude

I was extremly horny writing this begging, I got horny because every word that I have written comes stright from my heart. I mean everything, and the reality of how much pain and sacrifice I want to do for my Master gets me so horny I stoped to take a break to edge, I did not cum. Master did not tell me to cum, I am used for his pleasure, so I was unable to bring myself to cum. As I lay in bed thinking about how strong I wish to cum, and thinking, Wow...Master really controls me so much

ENERGY POWER

YAYY
Master opens his gift in 3hrs!
I wonder if he will like it!!~
ahghh I missed the gift soo muchzz
I Liked looking at it ^_^
its sooo mega ccutee <3 <3 <3
=^o^=
I just worry aghhh did it break...
AGHZZZ what iff he cant read my writing
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK I frogot to spell check my writing ^_^
lol just random worries fillz my headd rawrz
What if he opens the gift the wrong way?
or if he doesnt understand :O etc.
Not really worrying if he will like it..
theirs a quote...
If your in love, you will love any gift your lover gives you!~
So Since master loves his slave no worries ^_^
Then!~~ My other accomplishments for this week
WOAH..did you read alll my blogz yeaaaa I did like 3 blog entries all chocolate all 3pages long ^_^
I know, I'm an awesome kitty =^___^=
I feel happyy yaayyzz happiesss
Master has a boy whos a friend whos a roomate
so BOYFRIENDROOMATE
Masters boyfriendroomate I wonder what he looks like
master says hes ugly...but master says onew is ugly
Master and kitty argue last night abtz sleeping
I was like OPPAAA I WANNA GO SLEEPY AT 6AM
thennn Master was like KItty you go sleepy at 5am
thenn I was like OPAAAAAAAAA
THEN he was like KITTYYYYY
and thennnnn he said i can stay up 630am!
and thenn at 5am I was sleepy so I go bed ^_^
and thene Master was like UGHZZZ KITTYYY >_<
AND THEN I was like ^_^
ahh 5AM SLEEP WAKE UP 8AM!~ THEN MEGAA ENERRGYYY
NO NAPPIEZ ALLL DAYS NOT EVEN ONEZ YAYYZZ ENERGYY POWERR
and thennn tonight I stay up till 5am again and wake up 8am again and then MEGA ENERGY REPEATZZZ AND THENN MONDAY I REPEAT AND TUESDAY I REPEAT AND THEN WEND AND THURSDAY FOREVERZZZZZZZ AGHZHZZ YAYYZZZ ^_^
When I happy I use Z'S Super muchz like
Oppaz
Mazter
Gmailz etc. ^_^
I STAY UP LATEE ALLL NIGHT EVERY DAYYY!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I Make songs+poems+dances+words+ say oppaa lotz of times+ hum+piano+ asian dramas+ bloggyyyyyz+ fl+ EVERYTHINGZZ YAYYYZZ
STAYING UP LATE ROCKZ <3 <3

Zomgz

Objectification is term used to describe the process of regarding something or someone as an object. In this relationship, objectification will be a strong point in the relationship. The most important object that I will be objectified into is a bimbo. A bimbo, is a girl with large boobs, and is constantly focusing on sex, rather then work. Being a bimbo to my master, It will give him a sense of pride, knowing he has a trophy girlfriend, with the biggest breast. Having a bimbo has many benefits other then sex, it gives my master total power, to control and mold my mind the way he desires.

With this newly found power, he is able to let out his sadistic side. By denying his slave multiple times, he is hyper seualizing her. There are many hyper sexualizing techniques, my favorite technique is during cuckquean sesssions. As the slave watches her Master and the slave cum, she is denied the pleasure of cumming. This technique, encourages hypersexualization, but also encourages putting her Masters pleasure before hers. Being unable to cum during these sessions, she develops a deeper desire for his pleasure. As the sessions increase, the slave will be able to experience the same orgasmic pleasure, she feels when her master cums. Once the sessions have ended, the bimbo will be horny more often, but also have a deeper respect for her Masters pleasure, and disregard her own. This creates a perfect mixture of hypersexal bimbo, and also a bimbo that understand her sexual desires are not important.

Being a bimbo is a two step process, the first step is to lure the Master with her looks. This is achieved by having large EE breast. With these large EE breast, the bimbo would then wear a shirt that is two times smaller then her size, this creates a tight popping look, that brings immediate attention to her breast. After he is lured by the large breasts, he takes a closer look, to see that this Bimbo is lacking the proper outfit that covers her body completely, with high heels and miniskirt, the bimbo leaves just enough for his imagination to go running. After he has been successfully lured, the most important part for the bimbo is to perform her sexual duties, to the best of her ability. Using her tongue, in a way that pleases her Master. look forward to being objectified into a stupid bimbo, for my Masters pleasure. Using my tongue to please his cock, and allow him to use, abuse and explore my body for his own pleasures.

(^_o)

I stayed up all night in an intense skype call with master
The call included lots of screaming and firey eyes
And many hiding attempts under my blanket escaping from masters fire..
I wasn't quite hiding from myself but rather from master
So scary...
He tryed to scare me by saying he would dissown me if I messaged deadweights again
Deff served the purpose! So scared...
After he told me I wanted to cry...
I wanted to puke..
I wanted to just run away ~.~
Hiding undermy blanket telling myself not to cry..
Don't get sick..don't run away be strong..
Masters firey thing went away after a while..
When he's mad I can see..his eyes will change shape pre mad..
Then full blown mad the full shape is formed! Ahh...not cute
Then..later when I asked him about disowning me..
He got emotional..
Master shoudve had a blanket like kitty!~
I felt bad...why did I give him emotions ughhzz
I know I shouldn't feel bad that I caused emotions
I wonder if he always got emotional in the past with his last girlfriends...
I'm his first slave so its a bit hard to compare xD
Master didn't mean he would dissown me..
But when he said it..I felt used..
How could he make me believe in fairy tales and tell me I'm the only one..
Then he could so easily say he would dissown me.. like I wasn't special just the average slave that you could easily find..
I told master that I won't forget what he said
I know its not true but that feeling I don't want to forget
I need to do better so he won't ever say it again..
I'm special :/ not common I swear
I deleated all my deadweights..
Anyone who even spoke one word of dislike of master or pressured me or just not quality friends
After deleating only one of my bdsm friends were quality...in fact he loves master and he reads my blog!~~
He's a nice guy he helps me with math and never expects anything from me except for more blog updates :p
Haha master allowed me to cum but I have to txt him thank you
I went to sleep at6am!
I masturbated so tired, and cummed quickly!~
Then I closed my eyes and imagined I sent a txt to master
A cute poem..
Around 10am I woke up! Fuck, I didn't txt master
So sent txt then back to sleep
The poem was beautiful (atleast I thought so)
But too sleepy to end the poem beautifully haha
Master said it made him happy though
I like when I can make him smile!~~!
But when I woke up at 12pm it was weird..I felt free
I had 0 messages!
Nobody complaining about. Their life
No annoying messages from anyone..
The world looks more beautiful today!~
I've been released, not worrying if erik has money for college
Or about his drunk dad!
Or about his future because he can't keep a job
Etc. Etc. Etc.
Just my life with master!~~
Ahh feels good
Theirs a piano song...it explains my love for master
Simple but beautiful
Light but heavy...
Carefree but restricted..
Not appreciated by everyone but special to those who understand!~
The melody is perfect!~
I wanted to show master a sample..
I've had brief piano lessons..I only know how to hold my fingers...
It was hard I praticed 3hrs stright untill my hand started to cramp
And all I could think of was B F B C F...#A C ughzz...
The recording I sent master wasn't perfect!~
He said it was good but I know he was lying :/
Its cool bc I was up 4am-6am and I praticed and I'm doing greatz!!
I wanna finish bf finals
Its not a popular piano song...
Its chinese and I..can't read the tittle :p
Some people when they listen to it..
They say its romantic!
Others say its depressing
And then other stupid people say it sucks..
I wonder which catagory it will fall into for master...
I think its romantic, Romanticly simple :)
When I get married,I have the wedding all planned outz ^_^
I'm gonna play a song dedicated to my husband!~ and he will do the same!~~~ ahhh the best part of the wedding ^_^
whenever me and joppi eat lunch or something..we always decide " Wedding worthy?" its almost always no :p but can't help but ask each other ^_o
sometimes I feel bad..I am friends with someone, that I shouldn't be friends with.. and the worst part is that If she knew about all this..she would hate me foreverz, I guess you can say our relationship is going to end in 2012, leaving joppi and starting a bimbo life with master how perfect everything i wanted <3

ND

Ahh I wish oppa was here to wipe my tears :(
I hate when people come back into my life I get so confused...
Does that mean I'm a good person so they come back?
Am I a bad person but they want to settle for me?
Do they do it to trick me on purpose..
My ex..when we ended the relationship he told me
"Katie, your never going to be happy your worthless, a stupid young girl who doesn't have the skills to become. Anything in life, your a mean heartless bitch, I hope you rot in hell" *signs off*
After that my confidence tanked, I just considerd myself worthless, and I thought about switching careers..then I met master, he was wrong I was happy, super happy...everything he said was a lie..just a lie to stay with me and crush my dreams of deserving someone more educated and suitable to be my boyfriend, my master..
Recentlly, he has came back into my life..apparently I am the smartest,hottest, most caring girl in the world, and it was a privilage for him to date me..
I just cried endless tears after he said that..how could he destroy my confidence months ago and come back and tell me these things..how cruel..
But the same person I am so kind and gentle to..
Why am I so kind to him?
Why must I be his friend?
Why can't I block him...
Blocking him makes me just as cruel as him..
I'm not a cruel person
Why does master want me to be so cruel...
I just want to be a good person
One who makes everyone around them happy
One that saves lives...
A beautiful person inside
And a beautiful person outside

Loanna

 The human heart feels things the eyes cannot see, and knows what the mind cannot understand"

Limitless slavery is a form of a slavery involving giving up complete control to your owner. In limitless slavery, the slave gives up her rights to her Master. The slave has no property of her own including money, she forfeits her rights and property to her Master. In this relationship, the Master is obligated to provide the basic support needs to his slave, which includes shelter and food. But, how much food and where she lives is to decided by her Master. The most important aspect of this relationship is trust. Without the basic fundamentals of trust, a limitless slavery is difficult to achieve, trust will become the foundational knots that ties the relationship together.  The responsibility of having a limitless slave, can be daunting but the rewards far exceeds the extra responsibilities. Being a limitless slave to my Master I feel it can offer Master the opportunity to express his sadistic, creative side. Expressing his sadistic side, he will be able to find the hidden side of himself that is often left in the dark. Master wishes to hurt me, not entirely for his enjoyment, but rather out of love. I do not want to restrict his love, giving him the opportunity to express his love, to his fullest extent, without restrainment.

Limitless slavery, is sometimes called a taboo in the BDSM world. Many people consider it a fairytale, it is impossible for someone to love and trust a Master so much, that they forfeit their rights, and limits. Those who participate in limitless slavery, are able to experience the joy and beauty of slavery. Fulfilling the needs of their Master despite t he feelings they experience along the way. I will fulfill the needs of my Master, with the strongest emotions of happiness in my heart. Because, the pain I had to experience, is not pain at all, but rather his love for his slave. Wanting to experience this love, I feel a strong desire, a desire that leads me to crave the pain. Waiting anxiously for the next girl he will fuck, hoping he will fuck more, and puzzling over what lies in Masters sadistic heart for his Slave to feel. If cuckquean is just the top of his sadistic desires, then I want to feel the bottom. The bottom that includes whoring me out, and severe spankings. With this ideal in mind, I wake up filled with hope, and lust for pain. I say a mantra before bed, in my mantra, I have include a section dedicated to wanting to explore the sadistic side of my Masters love. The words, I have started to say are " Master, Please hurt me, hurt me as much as your heart desires, until you run out of pain to dish out. Your slave wishes to be hurt, and molded into the perfect Bimbo for your amusement." I have included that part, because I have again understood the beauty of the pain, and I do not want to forget the beauty of pain.

Endless boundaries for the expression of love, endless opportunities to hurt his kitty. But, limitless slavery is not focused on just pain, but rather has many dimensions. Dimensions that Master will explore with his power. Humiliating kitty, without her opposing, or whoring kitty out to his friends. What he can do with his power, has no limitations, the crucial part of a limitless slavery, is for a Master not to limit himself. Limiting himself to only one aspect of BDSM, or limiting himself to a few aspects of hurting his slave, many Masters become trapped in a box. An inescapable box, trapped in the mindset that they only have the powers to be a Master in certain aspects of their slaves life.

I am not yet a limitless slave, but rather a limitless slave in progress. In this progress, the hardest part for me is agree without begging or complaining. I will always agree to whatever he asks of me, but sometimes I find it hard to restrain myself from begging. But, that is a simple problem to correct over time this problem should be completely erased. Having this as my main problem, is not a limitation, but rather something that should be celebrated. Because it shows I  have the mindset to be a good limitless slave, but lack the final knots to tie it all together.

Limitless slavery is as beautiful as bondage knots. Limitless slavery and bondage knots are also similar by the importance of each knot, lacking one knot will cause the form to be broken, or less funtionable.  the first knot is the foundation, that will lay as the base of the relationship. This knot is trust, without trust the relationship will be lackluster. Instead of the beautiful enjoyable limitless relationship that it was intended to be, it becomes a forced relationships, lacking the beauty that once existed.  The second knot Is beauty, the beauty in giving up yourself to someone else. The ability to hand over your rights and wants to someone more superior to you, carries a strong undeniable beauty. Giving up your desires, for the hopes that your Master will fully enjoy himself, with whatever he wishes for you to do. Having one knot, but lacking the other is a liability to the limitless slave relationship. Although, the relationship might be able to still function, the true beauty of a limitless slave relationship has become lost.

I want our relationship to resonate with true beauty. Trusting Master more and more each day, making the foundational knot stronger. Trusting Master, I have shared with him the secrets of my past, and the wishes I have for my future. Everyday the foundational knot of trust becomes stronger. What I have have observed, is the stronger our trust with each other becomes, the stronger our love is, and thus we have started to see eye to eye on the beauty of being a Master and slave. The beauty has drawn us closer, and it will continue to become stronger as I am molded into being a limitless slave. The second knot, is not yet as strong as I would like, but everyday becomes stronger. Accepting Masters word as the law, and accepting without question. Being a limitless slave is far in the future, but our future will be beautiful. Sadistically perfect, Master hurting me with his love, while I complete his every desire. The true reward in a limitless slave is not power, but rather the beauty in having a slave so obedient and determined to do her best for her Master, fulfilling his wildest dreams, that he imagined was never possible.

Magisterial

My cuckquean cherry will be popped shortly, while thinking about this new experience I am ambivalent. I am scared, worried, confused but ultimately deeply in love. I am scared that Master will fuck others, and will develop apathetic feelings towards me. I am not a diffident person, but with him fucking others, he will discover that I am a dilettante, not able to satisfy him as well as others who are are more experienced with their tongues. He will no longer find happiness in my zealot, optimistic personality but rather focus on my flaws. My main concern about this is that master will become reticent about his unhappiness, and it will slowly affect our relationship in an adverse way. Masters implacable lust for girls, can passably be the demise of our relationship. Although, I have a few negative feelings regarding cuckquean, I feel delighted to be able to give Master this unique experience. Providing him with a copious amount of girls, ranging in body shapes and personalities.

As a slave, I am quite malleable, whatever Master wishes I can shift into that form of mindset, or personality. This quality trait, has become habitual. When Master asked me, how do I feel about cuckquean, although I had a pessimistic outlook on it, I was able to quickly transform my emotions into a optimistic viewpoint. My feelings towards cuckquean were ineffable, but, because I knew Masters deepest desires, was to have a cuckquean slave. I adapted my feelings about cuckquean, to be better suited for Masters desires. I put my personal feelings, on the back burner so that Master can accomplish his desire to own a cuckquean. I put my feelings last in the relationship, because it is my duty as a slave, to ensure my Master is happy. As a slave, I surrender my rights to emotions that counteract what my Master wishes, because these emotions are not compatible with my role as his slave. The role of a slave is to please her Master, despite her feelings towards the subject. Fulfilling my role as a slave, I have allowed my feelings to not play a role in the decision to be a cuckquean, but rather let Masters happiness with a cuckquean allow me to make my decision.

The first test, of my malleability was last night. Master wanted to set up a date with a girl called S, in hopes of a Birthday fuck. My first reactions, were hurt,confused,disappointed and sad, this confirmed Masters penchant for sex, over ensuring stability of our relationship. Due to the rush of feelings, I was detached, not knowing how to respond. After collecting my emotions, I told Master that It was a great idea. I took my negative emotions regarding the fucking, and shifted it into a positive light. Master fucking S is innocuous, and the outcomes would only be Masters happiness would be increased. Focusing on Masters happiness, the increase of his happiness outweighs the possibilities of a deleterious impact on the relationship. Focusing on the short term aspects, cuckquean would be mellifluous, but in the long term aspect it could be potentially erroneous. Certain problems could occur, that will make the relationship difficult to maintain. Problems such as STDs, babies, lack of attention to the BDSM relationship and more. These errors, could be the demise of the relationship, but I am willing to take the risk, so that master can achieve the short-term happiness that he is craving
.
Although, adding cuckquean can exacerbate our relationship, if done correctly it has the potential to ameliorate this relationship. The perfect relationship would end with Master exonerated, leaving him feel satisfied and refreshed without any ounces of guilt. A Master is entitled to be selfish, indulging in his needs while rejecting the needs of his slave. Ideally, I would like to see the girl he wishes to fuck regularly tested, along with making  sure she understands what type of relationship she will have with my Master. It will be  a relationship, that will allow no advancements, and will never advance into anything more then a quick fuck. Having the girl understand, completely what this means pertaining to babies, and other forms of romantic aspects is the most important aspect for a perfect cuckquean expirence. Having her understand her role in the relationship, will make me more comfortable towards the idea, thus allowing me to have a sense of ellan towards cuckquean. During the fucking, I would like to be edging, not able to cum until given permission form Master or denied permission from Master. Cumming, or not cumming during the cuckquean experience is not important to me. I enjoy the feeling of being teased, and denied but have no preference whether I should cum or not, if Master decides I should cum, I will be happy, but if he denies me to cum, I will still be happy. Although, I might not be able to cum I would like to see Master cum, cum many times, all over the place. After the experience has ended, I would like to be able to lick cum, or pussy juice from Master, as my souvenir. Remembering the taste of her cum in my mouth, or the taste of Masters cum would create a deeper memory in my mind, compared to a pantie or a picture. The taste of a cum from Master will remind me that I did not cause him pleasure, but someone else caused him this pleasure. The taste of the girls pussy's juice, on masters lips will remind me, that Master enjoyed himself with a girl that was not me. These two feelings, I will be able to remember clearly. I would be most unhappy with a girl who ignores the fact that she will not have any personal advancement in my Masters life, and ties us both down with STDS

I am excited to be a cuckquean and show Master my determination and desire to make him happy. With cuckquean Master can see my love for him, and my desire in the BDSM aspect of the relationship I have with him. Because, me and Master are currently long distance the first encounter with S, I will not be able to participate in it as much as I would like to, but I still wish for Master to enjoy this experience, even if I am not able to be apart of this experience. When I think the experience I have with Master is unfair, or I become unhappy, I think about the meaning behind being a slave, and how the meaning of being a slave, has affected the dynamics of this relationship. Being a slave, I am the property of Master, and I am under his full control unless otherwise stated. As his property, I am not entitled to anything, including money. But as his slave, I wish to give my Master, my owner, as much happiness as I can give him. Despite the pain I might feel, or the long term effects, my Master deserves and is entitled to feel the happiness he will receive by having a cuckquean.

Axiom

Today has really been the first time where I have sat down and looked at all of my blog posts.
It was really weird, seeing my sturggles and my happiness over the last few months.
I was ashamed of my writing, so ashamed that I never wanted to write!
My first assigment was just blahhh and so was the second and third, untill one day I got tired of master calling my writing garbage.
Lol that was intresting to read, I read my emotional distress about writing and my sturggles learning to write!~
Now months later my writing isn't better, but it has passed the garbage stage!
I try to write or read about writing everyday!~
The best pratices for my writing are the assignments, because it requires a deeper level of thinking.
Master quoted my assignment cuckquean often today, he loved it so much.
Cuckquean was the first assignment I felt I expressed my emotions in a clear way.
With small editing and better word choice It would be a really good thing to post in another forum like fetlife or cm profile journal!~
Since masters birthday is coming up and I am slowly feeling better about my writing and myself every passing dayy!
I decided to write a assigment everyday leading up to his birthday!~
Kinda like an advent calander and then the night before his birthday..I will release what I concider to be the best more anticipated assignment :D
I've been doing a bit of studies to make sure this is good!~
I am not sure why I work so hard on masters present..
If I had just sent him a present he would be happy
But I do many things :D
I like that about me..I don't limit myself!~
Master has a girl for a birthday fuck
At first I was jealous
So jealous I would implode
Then I was sad so jealous I cried
And then I was mad so mad I thought my face was a chili pepper!
And for a longg time I was numb..
I was reading,replying and chatting but I felt like nothing
I regained emotions and decided my emotion was happy!
I want to atleast try out cuckquean if I hate it and I don't want to do it
Then me and master can discuss who knows I might love it!~~~~~~
Master won't find another girl like me, I'm not a easy pick
So I don't get worried about him losing intrest :)
Now I just want his happiness!~
I tried to make blessings for master I had blessings of happiness..blahh
Happy master
Happy cock
Happy balah blahh
Etc. Why so much happiness!~~
Before I met master, he wasn't happy with his girlfriend.. no happiness alloweed!
Now everyday I hear him say he is happy, I brung a happiness to him
I can't wait to bring more!~ happiness+warmth+boobies+simpleness!~+ bentos+chowmeinss+cuckqueaning things+ girls for him to fuck...aggghh endlessless list
Master found happiness in kittys world of simplicity, simply bringing happiness not for her personal gain but just because of love
But kitty also was able to learn something from master
Learning to never give up, to stop writing garbage!~~ learning to seek education in Masters complex world, I am not yet competent, but I am confident that I won't give up :)
Before Master, I never worte essays for fun!
Now everyday I write essays, 2 pages min, its not a drag but rather enjoyable
I enjoy the most when I write pages for assignments!~ letting my submissive mind go crazy :)
Today I did something crazy
I typed up 14 (unfinished) pages of vocabulary :o
Wahhhhhh and then I have to retype into my flashcard set oh joyz!~
Inspiration, by my master :D

Bootcampz

Master is so awesome ^_^
I always knew he was awesome but ehh...never this much awesome
Master kinda quizzed me on the book I was reading called Great Expectations
I thought I knew the book really really really good but after the quiz although I got most of the questions right, I found that I wasn't reading enough to answer deeper level questions.
I started reading more actively and surprisingly I found lots of good things~~
I have a lot of theories...but I need to find things to back it up :O
Since I finished part one of the book I am going to go back and find things to support my theories and my ideas and put it in a word doccument..
Master he wants me to write a ten page essay on this book!
I told him he was crazy -_-
I thought he was joking, but he seemed really serious?
Maybe I'll get lucky and he really was joking?
but just in case he is NOT joking, I am making a word doccument of intresting things that I can connect later...
I know master wants 10 page of substance not 5 pages of substance is 5 pages of fluf..
but to be honest I always do 1 page of substance and then the rest is fluff...
OR I just pay a slave, pay a friend or order a slave to do my essays....
rawrr so long has it been since I wrote something so long by myself -_-
I told Master that in the book I am reading, I find that I am most like this guy in the book who does not learn that much, but believes he learns sooo much when really he has learned nothing..
Master told me I am not like that guy since I have learned so much
Maybe Master is right..Master got really mad multiple times during the skype call because I am afraid...I am afraid that maybe, just maybe I am not good enough to go to a great school..not good enough to write great essaays or take classes. His eyes went like >_< when Master gets mad his eyes get soo SMALL it looks like (>_<)  he doesn't look cute anymore =[
Master looks super cute like this when he is happy (^_^)  He was mad for a long time he was so pissed...Just eating his steak in a pissed way and just screaming at me..He screamed and screamed and screamed I just felt like crying >_<  Master was soo mean...blahhh
After the mean phases went away and Master was too tired to be pissed ^_^ I thought about it, Master is pissed because he knows I can do better so I have to do better from now on!
After that little peptalk to myself I was ready to do better :) I reread a few chapters of the book, and read the book with active reading! I wasn't sure If i knew how to read actively, so before I read I decided it would be best if I read a few articles on active reading. That helped me a lot, after reading the book again I found many things that I did not see earlier :) that made me happy the next time master questions me on the book I am gonna show big improvments 100% guranteee and since Master wants me to write a 10 page paper on the book I decided to start reading a college textboook called Writing Annallyticaly, actually its not a bad read I learned many things!
Now when I read the book ever page I ask myself these questions maybe not all of these questions, but atleast some of these question ^_^
1.Which detials seems significant? Why?
2.What does the detial mean?
3. What else might it mean?
4.  How do the detials fit together? What might they have in common?
5. What do these pattern of details mean?
6. What else might these same pattern of details mean?
7. How else could it be explained?
These 7 questions are like so amazing! I've found lots of reoccuring patterns that I brushed off as nothing! Like the Mist, the birds, some friends, how characters are described! and more! ^_^
maybe I am reading too deeply into the book, but I rather have a lot of theories and just narrow them down to the ones I can actually prove then not having many theories :D
I tryed to tell my friend Joppi to try reading the textbook, since its actually not a dull read but rather a intresting read. She was not intrested in reading the textbook its not that big of a read just 384 pages! compared to the 544 pages in great expectations! Although I am reading writing annalytically I am also reading "Elements of Style" which is a short read at only 105 pages! I told her about both of these books, she wasnt intrested in reading =/ A part of me felt like pip in the book wanting to pass all the information to her so that when I do score high, and become a scholar..she won't be left behind. That feeling, feels terriable!  I still try to pass down the information still, it's things she will need!~ I personally feel like self help books are amazing for me! I take the information I learn and run with it, I learned a lot of my grammar not from actual teachers but rather from books. My grammar is still bad, because I did not finish the book yet lol xD But, now when I get back english papers, I dont get points off for bad grammar, but rather points off for other flaws. My grammar went from a F- to a B- ^_^  I hope to get it to a A+ soon :) like  Ocotber 1st soon ;)
So Masters present.....I got it! I got the BEST idea, and it came to me in the most RANDOM place ever..  The present, is something master does not believe in. But, it is something that I believe in strongly! I know its kinda risky giving him something he does not believe in..I hope he will use it though ^_^  if not use, atleast put it somewhere he can see it everyday!~~
I like this gift, maybe a bit better then mudkips even though mudkips wouldve been great if I wasnt such a clutz hahah. I don't think I am ever gonna tell Master what hapapned to mudkips lol so stupid what caused mudkips to be destroyed lol...
I love arts and crafts, but I suck at actually crafting?
LOL so I screwed up Masters current present..I screwed up prettyy bad...
I saved it though! I think,I screwed up more then I planned to..but I saved it and it still looks pretty?
I asked joppi what she thought of the gift she said it was PERFECT but it was too girly..
Ooops.....
I can't help adding my own little girly touch?

I try to tell joppi as much as I can about Master and our relationship in a vanilla wayy!
I even want to tell joppi about how I am writing a 10 page paper, in a normal couple relationship I guess your boyfriend wouln't tell his girlfriend to write a 10 page paper...So I phrased it as Boot camp!
LOL and with this Boot camp idea.. I am able to explain a lot of my reasonings to her not only about studying but also about weightloss and eating healthy for the mind...and reading weird books ^_^ LOL I laugh when I think about how vanilla I can make anything for joppi :)

 me: Adam said if I cant answer his math question in less then 25 seconds without a calculator then I need to start his  bootcamp lol it took me 5mins to answer >_<
 joppi: lol
 me: his bootcamp is ccrazyy joppi O_o
 joppi: lmao boot camp?
 me: likeee the first thing that i am doing on his bootcamp is writing a 10 PAGE PAPER
  on a book
  10
joppi: wtf
 me: ONE ZEO page.o_o hes crazy right?
 joppi: yesss
 me: I dont even write my own essayss in english class o-O when im done ill send you the first page ;)
 joppi: hahaha wow
 me: yea...crazy bootcamp..
 and lsat night he waas like whats 90,555,560,450/5
  it was crazy o_o I missed yoko
 joppi: haaaaa wow i need paper  nd pencil
 me: lol yea no paper allowed in bootcamp
 joppi: k iam droppin out wat was the guessin  *Translation : The question*
 me: lol the question? ill tell you tomarrow ;)
joppi: lol wow congrats
me: lol :) dont worry joppi after i finish adams bootcamp ill bring the bootcamp to you ;) 25page essay on jodi picoult sister keeper
 joppie: ya no thank  nope  nawt doin it
 me: lol he said that when he gets kids each year their kids need to write a essay like If they are in 3rd grade they need to write a 3page essay and if they are in 4th grade... a 4 page essay etc.
  O_O starting from 1st grade
  I think his kids will run away
 joppi: o my
 me: Theyll run to your house ^_^
  and your kids will laugh at them and say they have no eyes
joppi: haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
  omgg
  imaginee
 me: I Keep telling him his kids will run away no christmas+esssays =/
 joppi: okay or the kids will won't like hym at all like hate
 joppi: u should tell hym tat
 joppi: don't marry hym
 me: lol i love him ^_^
 me: true true
  hes asian?
 josephine: -_-
 me: lol
2:54 PM Maybe when u get an arranged ull have a guy like adam
  someone who seems really normal but is not normal at all but really strange

Make-shift

Rawr
Today I realised...
I always let master into my life
but master always blocks me in his life
rawrrr wtf is with that -_-
whateverzz I am chillazed...
Always calm and collected kitty ^_^
for everyime master makes me go rawrrr I can multiply it by the time master makes me go <3 or fangirl
ahh....... Fangirling beats my rawring by like 1million
I can fangirl like 20times in 30 seconds!
Master knows <3
sometimes I think he secretly supports fangirling by making me fangirl
ahh...I looked like a fool today fangirling >_<
but master was shirtless and his hair was so long and perfect and his eyes were so cute and big
and he just made my heaart race <3
and his yawning face looked like a kitten super cutezz :D
ahhhh!! I love Master
When I meet him, I know it will be easy to serve him..hes just so cute that I want to just do everything instantly
When Master thinks too much he looks ugly -_-
that means! I keep mater cute by making him think less!
letting him have someone where he can just froget about the world and complex thinking and just think simply :)
because I think simply so master should think simply also!~!
Today I was shopping lalala and thinking about oppa then I found the PERFECT gift :)
Its not really a gift that better then mudkips
its more of a gift that is special..not that mudkips isnt special
I worry a lot about my gift...will he think its garbage..will he throw it away...will he hate it...will he say he loved it but hated it...ugh
This gift..is not store made
I had to make it myself
With creativity and my hammer ^_^ haha
Ahhh my hammer is so scary i'm so scared like AHHH did i hammer myself?
I wonder if he will use it...
nono I decided after all my stressing -_- master MUST think or concider a gift for kitty on her bday or christmas or something ~.~ aghh too much stress
why is master so hard to please blahhhzzzz
I wish he was more simple then gifts would be easy :)
but then again..master doesnt even like the thought of a gift
on another note
I want a logo
I was thinking...
What makes my emails diffrent from everyone else?
what makes the pictures I send diffrent?
How many times does oppa get a cute picture?
o_o do I need a logo?
Nope!
Do I -want- a logo..yea XD
lol whats the chances I will use my logo?
Low chances..
Master and kitty are not a company XP
lol idk..
I have a few designs I will show next post ^_o needs lots of work!
So Lastt night
Master foundout that cuckqueaning is a big fetish of mines
ranked number 2 in top 5!~
close cut between orgasam denial and cuckquean
I wanted cuckquea number one..
but then orgasam denial must be number one if i wanted to do them both together
Master was so happy last night!
it erased every ounce of doubt from my mind..
every doubt regarding if I should continue..
I always think- Maybe I should quit, maybe we are not fated and I am not the slave he wants, hes just settling, but really hes waiting for a supermodel who speaks chinese and can write like stephen king and can sing like alica keys.. instead he got a girl that looks blah, cant speak chinese, can not write like stephen king, but rather a kindergardner and can't sing at all
I am happy that he can be so happy with someone like me  ^_^
me and master are a good fit :)
I swear next posts are on cuckqueen fantasies and then limitless slavery (no order) just soon ^_^

Simplicity

Usually...I name my titles of blogs random things, the first thing in my mind!
but today I named it simplicity for a reason.
I thought about it, Master got an A on a test for English class.
What should I do..
Should I sing this song, should I just scream yayy!, should I dress up super sexy...
I decided, that I am going to do my best attempt to impress Master with an essay!
I am not the best writer, I slaved so hard to make this look good..
last night I did get a chance to read elements of style :) so I used a lot of the tips!~
Using more active verbs, less passive verbs, more sentence variety etc.
Even if my attempt at an essay fails, I hope Master can see the hard work I put into it, I started this essay at 6pm and its 10pm now :o ahhh!~~
I originally was going to write about ANR relationships, and then I thought about writing about being a limitless slave to fulfill my assignment :p
I  wanted to write about limitless slavery, but this is a present not an assignment :p
So! I imagined I was on fetlife explaining what makes my master special, what makes us different from every other relationship on this site! ^_^  I touched on several topics including what makes relationships fail and other random things
I named this post simplicity because I hope in this writing master can find the simple emotions present in my writing, I know he will not dig for my emotions.
But writing this, I wrote simply with beautiful simple emotions.
I took simple sentences of my emotions, and tried to manipulate them to something more coplex, just like Master has tried to do with me.
I even saved my first ORIGINAL draft 
I hope master asks so he can see how that simple progress went!~!
So without further adieu
CONGRATULATIONS MASTER, GET MORE A'S!~~


A strong BDSM relationship, requires the strong support of healthy, sane Master . Masters failing to provide strong support, are incapable of long-term relationships, because Slavery is 95% mental, and 5% physical. Masters unaware of the value of developing strong mental relationships, will encounter more obstacles. Miscommunication, commonly arises because of negligence of the mentality of slavery. Masters incapable of having long-term slave, often believe slavery is 95% physical and 5% mental. This mind-set results in barriers preventing the growth and evolution of the relationship. My Master constantly reminds me of the importance of keeping this mind-set, because it applies to Masters as well as slaves.

Long-distance BDSM relationships, are beneficial, not detrimental. Long-distance, allows deeper understanding of what the future foretells. Because of the lack of physical contact, stronger mental relations are built. My Master has discussed his expectations of me in the future. By discussing our plans, it allows me to adapt to my Masters expectations. Listening to my feelings he directs the relationship accordingly. Our relationship has evolved, towards a limitless slavery.

Progressing towards limitless slavery, takes time. My first bump in the journey occurred when Master wanted to have multiple girlfriends. I immediately rejected the idea, hurt and jealous by his suggestion. He showed no further interest, instead he continued gently molding me. He asked me last week about having multiple girlfriends, overjoyed with the prospect of him with other girls, I offered to help him find girlfriends. I grasped the concept, that my personal needs, are not important. From his tendering care, I valued his happiness over mines. Master uniquely used the distance between us to benefit him.

Master did not direct my focus on completing tasks, but rather the mindset behind completing tasks. I'm a slave who has never experienced bondage, or experienced a proper spanking. But rather, I write essays regarding the topics that appeal to Master. Essays allows me to analyze a large range of BDSM topics, to understand the mentality behind them. For example, one of the essays I wrote was about Bimboism, In this essay I analyzed the thinking process of Bimbos. I analyzed from the clothes Bimbos wear, to the thinking process in their brains. I presented Master with a detailed analysis of the mindset of a Bimbo. Information I gained from this essay, gave me the understanding I needed to be molded into the perfect Bimbo for Master.

To mold my mind, Master has gone with an unusual approach. Self molding, allowing me to mold to what he wishes, as time and trust grows. With patience, this method yields great results. Results Master has yielded from his method are astonishing. Growing as a person, as well as a slave because of him. My journey as a limitless slave is long. So far, I am a slave that Master owns proudly. I have become Kitty, a slave willing to sacrifice her happiness for her Masters. My Master has remained true to hiself, never losing sight in this relationship. As Master helps me become a limitless slave, I know he will be happy every step of the way with his Kitty.

Quickyy

Quick update!

So, Offically addicted to this book Great Expectations!
I love it <3
The author is like toying with my emotions..
I read the book and I start crying noo........
and then when the character is nervous..my heart IMPLODES ahh!~~
well at night I think I am more emotional..
I can read a book at 3am and cry my eyees out
but I can read the same thing at 11am and nothing will happen just "oh..ok!"
yeaa I'm weird!~~~
Master got an A on a test ^_^ a midterm yayyy
he usually gets C's so now I want to do something awesome for him <3
nothing like usual!
I have been working on my surprise for a bit ughh I wonder if he will like it...
It is not what I usually do like emails, poems and singing
lol something more thoughtfull^_^
something he can appreciate!~!!
yayyzzz but ugh so much hardwork..
I hate biting my nails, but I cant help but bite my nails as I worry if it willl look good...
Will it look good mm...will he like it?
what if he hates it...
!.! rawrr
anyways gotta go back to working!~! I need to finish before master goes to sleep!

I'm Backz!~~~~

Heh, I am back to writing like an annoying person online!~ atleast for today!~


So, I wrote so much to Master :o 9 pages to be exact.
Nothing was more scary then sending it, I wondered if he would read it...
But..After I sent it I suddenly became so worried, ughhh what if he doesnt like it or what if he won't read it..what if he is super mad at me..what if he thinks diffrently of me...so much things
Master said my place in heart was secure so I guess I felt a bit better but not that much :o
He hasent said anything about what I wrote...just hasent talked to me today
does that mean he doesn't accept it?
does that me he doesnt like me anymore?
or does that mean that I am just going crazy ~.~
He said he wants to focous more....
Focous without a kitty?
I've become so paranoid today *sighs* I guess i've never really shared 9 pages of typing with anyone..lots os spelling and grammar mistakes...incompplete sentences and commas in the wrong spots you know the typical :p
Master did not tell me about his roomate
I was so mad..
I was so hurt </3
Why is he hiding things about his life from me..
It's enough that I am a secret relationship, but now he doesnt even want to tell me about his life =/
At that momment..I felt like a fool....
I don't know Master i wonder what other "small" details he is hiding.. blah I felt so stupid..
When I got mad, I think master wanted to punnish me...
or maybe he wanted to dissown me..
maybe he wanted to make cry..
maybe he was going to tell me something mean..
but for whatever reason he did not tell me.. I wonder what it was....
I decided affter maybe an hour not to get mad about the roomate its his life if he doesnt want to tell me that he shouldnt be forced..since it wasnt "important" should I be concerened about it..?
If I had a roomate and never told him I wonder how Master would react..
Oh yea, I have a roomate she isn't importanat so I never told you..
I think Master would implode..
Today something shocking happened :o
I was skyping with Mark
an annoying, overly horny genious! he got a perfect score on this test woah..
Anywaysss he skyped me so I just put on a tshirt, and short and put my hair up ^_^
I looked cute I think the shirt really made me look angelic <3 It was just a new white shirt hehe
I GOT THE BEST SKYPE SETTTING <3 <3 <3 MY PICTURES LOOKS GREAT YAYYYYYYY MASTER NEEDS TO SKYPE ME ASAPZ!
BUT back to the story :O
I was just working on a math problem lalalala and then he was like
so Katie, I was on facebook and your relationship status is single
I was like... Uhh...Its complicated
then he said according to facebook your single *wink*
Blahh why does he make life complicated
then I said wanna see something cute?
He was like "ooo...."
then I switched screen to show him my boyfriend
I showed him this picture

Yep! IT'S ONEW!~

I showed him what my boyfriend sent me before he left for summer classes and then I asked him if he thinks he loves me? and went on about how he speaks cantonese and hes the cutest chinese boy ever!~~~ and, we are secretly dating! After that...Mark finished the math problem then he had to go...Ahhh I guess he didn't like onew =/ Mark is into chinese things/people like CRAZYY but hates Korean ^_^ or chinese people who speak catonese(wth) Did I lie to him about Master? I dont think so...Master sent me a picture just like this ^+^ a picture with his backpack and he smiles happily and we are dating secretly..I wasn't sure if it was ok to show Masters pictures to Mark..but ughh I don't really like this onew picture =/ Masters was soo like 12x more cute <3 but its ok Onew I still like you, just not as much as I like Master :)

After Mark left, I knew he wasn't coming back and I was kinda happy..I worked on studying by myself! I worked for 3 hours and 10 mins and that does not even include the essay! so really 3 hours and 35 mins... I worked on Math the whole time, I did really good by mself to be honest! I just have a few questios like Why is this answer xx but not yyy or Why can't I use XXX formula instead of YYY formula lol ^+^ I'm good...Maybe mark will come back lol

But, I decided before I write any more essays for Master I need to read! I am reading a book master recommended called Great Expectations I will read this book and base my essays off of this book :O ahhh..I hope master will be able to grade my essays with better score I should be done by tonight then I can write a blog about being limitless :) yayy...I hope master comes online tonight

Auto

Ahh!~ I've found my writing zen

Today, I am looking for songs for Master to sing! I am doing my best to chose easy songs for him, no rapping no insane Korean just simple. I love love ballads <3 I want to chose the really sappy ones so it feels like Master is singing that to me!~ But, I also like stupid songs like Super junior Sorry Sorry, here is just a little snippet of Sorry Sorry

Cuckquean

Master gave me the opportunity to be Katie, instead of Kitty. He gave me this opportunity for only a few hours. When Master treated me as Katie, I noticed something strange. I discovered that, I am Kitty, Katie is no longer a part of me. When I was Katie, It was so hard for me to call Master "Adam" I even had to struggle to type in first person. Being a slave, has become a undeniable part of myself, In this relationship I have discovered where my place is. I am Kitty, Masters slave, but as the relationship progressed, I have allowed myself to agree to Master's ideas. Not just agree to his ideas, but want to complete his crazy ideas to the best of my abillity. Master, he says he has a sadist side to himself, I cant wait to see that side of him come out. I want Master to want to hurt me for his own pleasure, disgregarding my opinions and emotions. This pain can be longterm, or short term, whichever he pleases. As a slave, pleasing my master with pain, shows my true devotion to my Master. I hope for him to hurt me as long, and as hard as he can, so that my Master can see how devoted I am to his happiness, and servicing him.

Master, he enjoys fucking a wide variety of girls, his taste is quite broad. Because, of the large variety he enjoys, it is often hard for him to find every girl he wishes to fuck. That is where I come in, by helping Master find as much girls as he can. In terms of pleasing Master sexually, Master may be pleased having a bimbo waiting for him at home, but having the same flavor icescream gets boring. To ensure he is happy to the fullest extent, it is part of my duty as his bimbo slave to find other girls for Master to fuck, when he gets tired of me. Because this is a part of my duty as his slave, I will find these girls with eagger and excitment in hopes of pleasing Master. I will also encourage Master to fuck more girls, so that Master will continue to be pleased sexually. As a Master, he has the right to fuck these girls without my permission, or without me watching for however long he pleases. A big fantasy that I have is, watching Master fuck other girls as I watch horny in my chastity belt. Because, I have had these type of fantisies for a while, it makes servicing Master with girls, a less painful more enjoyable expirence. I do not want to take away from the expirence of fucking other girls by becoming jealous, or by making Master feel guilty by engaging in his right as a Master.

As Master slave, in the next 2 years on my birthday I want to show Master, my submission to him as his cuckquean, his slave that lives for his pleasure. I want to get piercings on that day, Nipple and clit piercings. I want to end my birthday with a brand new chastity belt. Showing Master, that as I enter this new chapter of my life I give up everything to him, and I am his slave. He can use me, or deny me of any pleasure at any time he wishes. Master already has complete control of my mind, but the most prescious part of me, my sexual pleasures, I want him to own. After he owns that part of me then truely, Master has owned a cuckquean slave, controlling her mind, her money and her body. This is Kitty's deepest desires, to give Master everything, because this part of Kitty, that desires to please master wont subside, untill I can give Master everything, and make him happy for the rest of his life.

Writing this assignment, it was intresting for me, it was not a 'drag' to write. I was able to learn a lot about myself, I never knew my desires were so strong untill I just sat down and typed my deepest emotions. Pain, has been a touchy issue for me in the past, I never let someone hurt me. But for Master, it is diferent I want him to hurt me. I want Master to show me his sadist side, or any side of Master I dont want him to feel like as a Master he has to hide parts of his personality, because the world does not agree with it. Maybe his Masochist side is dark and scary, but to me Master will always appear warm and bright in my eyes, I felt a great sence of love for master during that paragraph. During the second paragraph, I felt a new emotion. I was so horny I could not control my hands, but I did not even penetrate myself, because once I start masturbating I know I wont be able to stop. I am so wet, and so horny now, thinking about being Masters Cuckquean. Being Master's cuckquean, at first was an idea that I found strange, but now it is a idea that I am so desperate to cum to. I am so excited to find a girl for Master to fuck, as I watch, or hear about how awesome the sex was. I took a short break to search chastity belts, and look for pictures of cuckquean, my pussy was so wet viewing pictures. The last paragraph, has been something that I have been thinking about a lot, what should I do to show Master he owns everything. I can't wait for the days to pass, for me to get the peircings and chastity belt, and even my collar! The day where Master can proudly tell the world, This is my girlfriend Katie! but also the day where Master can feel accomplished as a Master, he has everything, the best slave that loves him more then he knows. This assignment really made me think about pleasing Master, and our lives together in a whole new perspective.

Failz

Master, he wanted me to write about being a cuckqueen but, somehow I went way off topic. It's a waste to just delete this paragraph, so here is my failed attempt at Masters prompt, I did not double check this since its just trash sorry!~

Being a slave, you have two options, two unspeakable options. The first option is to make your Master happy all the time, and the second option is to make your Master happy sometime, when you feel like it. I chose the first option, this can also be called a limitless slave. A limitless slave, is a term that many Masters dream of saying, because this is a slave without any limits, the master can use or abuse this slave at their own discretion. I am not yet a limitless slave, but rather a slave who works on becoming limitless. Taking small steps everyday, to make master happy, thinking less about myself and more about my Master. Because this relationship is still online, it is a bit difficult to take the steps to make my Master happy. For now I just practice small things, like leaving him alone to study, letting him go out with his friends to strip shows, and just being flexible with anything and everything. So far, Master has not asked me to do anything serious that shows my efforts on being limitless. An example of something serious, would be Master asking me if he could have a girlfriend, other then me. If master asked me that, I would be deeply hurt, my mind would go crazy. But, I would never tell Master no because I know that having a girlfriend, would provide him with the emotional and sexual support that he craves for. Since I can not give that to him, the least I could give him would be the ability to fulfill his cravings. If Master craves Spanish bimbos, its my job to befriend every hot bimbo and lure them to Master.

Lee Seung

Waiting in my black corset, dressed to kill with makeup on and my books on my lap. I anxiously counted down forty mins, but then forty mins turned to one hour, and finally that one hour turned to tomarrow. My parents were not home tonight, they went away for the weekend. Home alone, Master had plans to help me study for, but I had plans to distract master from studying. Now that I think about it, I guess dressing up is foolish, since Master does not view me in the sexuall way. Master has a friend named Roxx, Rox wanted to go to a strip club. Master messaged me, he was like " Ughh, Roxx wants to go a strip club." I guess he was informing me or testing how I felt about that. I probably should have told him what I prepared, but he would be more sexually excited with strippers. Guys say, girls are complicated, but I think guys are the complicated one in the relationship. Of course I am probably contridicting myself, since I dressed up for Master, and never even told him. I guess, I like to surprice him, I know, I know I need to stop with the surprices. Master never sees me dress up sexy, or wear makeup I just thought I could do that for him tonight. No big deal though, because I can dress up anytime, I guess, at the end of the day, I just wanted to make sure Master was happy tonight. Even If I am not included in his plans for tonight, atleast he had fun? I always ponder how to accuretly describe me and Masters relationship, sometimes I want to describe it by comparison to foods, other times drinks, and on the rare occasions inanimate objects. In my head, It feels like Master is that tough cool guy, and I am that cute girl trying to crack his tough exterior! Yesterday, I learned something personal about master, I was really surpriced to hear it. I am not quite sure why he decided to tell me, he could have easily made his point without the story. I was so touched when he told me the story, did he really care about me this much to tell me a story so personal? My touched feelings were soon erased, Master tried to say what my life is like. I wonder if I told him what my life is like if he would listen? To him my life is like, sprinkles on vanilla icescream, just an after thought. Vanilla icescream honestly tastes really good, people add the sprinkles just to make something so plain look beautifull. I think vanilla icescream is beautifull without the need for sprinkles, or nuts I like the simplistic beauty that the vanilla icescream brings. Master and I will have known each other for almost a year soon. In a year have I learned a lot about Master, or have I wasted the year? I wonder which I would be able to confidently say, I just know that in one year Master has changed. Did he change because of me, lol just joking I know Master would never change over a girl. Master said before this relationship he was arrogant, and always hurt the girls closest to him, but what changed is now he will appologize for hurting me. I never expect an appology when Master hurts me, only because the pain never lasts too long. An appology from Master is like a band-aide, a regular brown band-aide. But, " I love you Kitty, don't be mad" is like a hello kitty band-aide. Am I such a simple girl, pictures and I love you makes me feel better. Master has changed to adapt to this relationship, I need to change also, before Master decides he does not want me. I need to work hard, work hard to be more serious, speak with less smilies and just improve general knowlodge. I know Master is training me to be a bimbo, but I think Master wants a super smart girl. I feel bad when I fail, I want to become better for Master.
I have started a new subbing project, yeah I sub music videos, a job made for lame people. I usually sub songs, that I can relate to, does that mean the song I am subbing right now I can relate to? The song I am subbing, it is a bit sad, but its such a beautiful ballad! Even Master can classify this song as "real music." It is a old song, made by an old singer but so good <3. Nobody subs songs made by old singers, how sad! After I finish subbing that song, I am going to subb other songs that I want Master to sing in october ^_^. Master may have ditched my last night, but its cool because I still studied. I studied while chatting to new people, what a intresting way to study. I met this asian boy he lives in New york, ehh I dont think he really likes me. He thinks I am too excited, too much coffee. But I dont drink coffee I said! The poor asian boy did not believe me =/, do you REALLY need coffee to become energised? I am just naturally happy, naturally full of energy and naturally this cute ;) haha. For the most part, meeting people was mega fail last night but *shrugs* not everyone is going to want to be my friend. Those lucky few who do wont regret it!~ Master he is so weird, he said that he does not think that people online can be sincere and real. But, he still decided to take a chance, and he took a chance replying back to my message. My message was pretty stupid, kinda carefree eh. I am happy he replied to me, and even happier to show you the best email I ever got EVER. Well, MM.... the email is -almost- as good as the pictures master sends. OMG, he sent the cutuest picture ever he was smiling with a little pose <3 ahhh. This email, is maybe the email that contains Masters most personal emotions, at the time I was really, really hurt. But, now when I read this email I don't care? It makes me wonder, why did I even care? It was not even a big deal but here is my favoriate part of the email. The part I read over and over when I "hate Master"

I met you soon after and I really liked you, I just didn't want to scare you away, because you might have thought that I was just going to let you be a mistress or an affair of sorts, when I really wanted you to be that center person of priority.I trust you Katie. I trust you very much. I feel that I can find mutual happiness with you. I will make up for it. You can choose, to be done with all the assignments that I have given (and not yet completed), or for me to buy you a gift.

hehe Cute right!~, Master liked me he really did like me ^_^. Master never says I love you Katie, and I guess its fair since I never say I love you Adam. But, in this part of the email it shows he loves katie!~ hehehehehehe ^_^. I don't know why I still get happy and giggly when I think about Master loving kitty and kattie. I need to grow up right? I think for me, the hardest part being with Master will be growing up to be more mature, the mature kind of person that doesn't giggle when he says " I love you Katie." The mature girl who doesn't send emails when she is bored and entertain Master with creepy,cute things *cough* chowmein song. I know Master likes this cute things at the momment, but soon, really soon I know he will tell me to stop. I hope he doesn't tell me to stop, I have so much more ideas, I look forward to Finals, and Midterms, and the first day of school.. I know last finals I didnt send anything ~_~ I was too busy failing all my classes lol

Math Master

Aghh Today has been a rollercoster ride for me and my master ~_~
starting with my master screaming at me like BLAHHHHHHH
and ending with him asleep on skype dreaming of boobies :)
Master agreed that he was being harsh about the whole china thing..
which is true but *Sighs* I wonder..if I did not have a master would I have gone to china with him?
would I be willing to risk EVERYTHING just to see what it could be like?
risk my life just to see what it could be like..I wonder
I am the type of girl that believes everyone and will be the first to be tricked
I am also the type to accept a wide RANGE of baggages..
I don't have many normal friends online and in real life..
Online well the sanity of my friends I would question
in real life my friends are ALMOST sane :o
but me..I think I am 100% sane?
I just perfer having intresting friends?
I can have a friend who likes onew
ORR
I could have a friend who hates onew, is a crossdressing vampire that has a mob and will kill me if i piss her off.
MM....I think life with a vampire mob friend is a bit more spicy ;)
that being said I would never invite that friend to my wedding too dramatic..
actually the only friend I would concider invinting to my wedding is actually..mmm Julia a crossdresser and that is concidering she looks passable..
But the problem with Julia is she is 6 foot, fat guy with strong distinctive male atributes... even with makeup she looks a bit..BLAH but whatever if she looks passable she can come :)
I decided I wanted to not be kitty for today I just wanted to be normal..but I kept talking as kitty ~_~ I can't NOT be kitty..Kitty has become a part of myself being anything but kitty to master just doesn't feel right it just feels wrong..
thats why today I realized..Being kitty sucks but being kitty..is the only thing I know how to do for master..If master woke up and said he doesnt want a bdsm relationship just normal I wouldnt be able to accept for a long time lol I just want to be kitty..I just want to be HIS kitty..of course my blog atm is maybe biased since im blogging and watching master sleep beautifully <3
in his sleep he is smiling..he smiled just for a quick second! I think for that quick second..he thought about me :)
Today I finally admitted to master that I have been studying for standard testing
BUT out of the 25 math questions pratice.the highest I can score is 5 right XD ugh..I dont understand the problems It just hurts? the book explains it but the book makes no sense using big words I dont understand and then when i google I get bigger words and bigger concepts i never understood *Sighs*
I am not stupid..I am just not as smart as master ;)
master has decided to do a study plan 3hrs a day studying with him..untill summer ends soo mmm a month and a few dayss? I say summer ends september 1st..Master has a long way to go...I don't think he knows how long he has to go XD if he knew..I think he would give uo lol
I want to give up also but nonono No giving upz...Master is so great investing time into me :) it is a risky investment so I need to work hard to make sure that he knows he made the right choice!~
but just studying 3 math problems with him my head hurts I MISS MY CALCULATOR master said MARI JANE YOKO belongs in the garbage =[
Mari jane yoko has the best spot in my room :) I put her next to the icescream piggybank yuji bought for me <3 the icescream piggy bank was one dollar..BUT the PRICE of items dont matter to me but rather the intention..and his intention was.. I LOVE YOU KATIE <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 AHHH...

Master has been looking at a pet tag for me..if master sent me a gift in the summer time it's more safe ^_^ since kitty is always home 24/7!~ I wonder if the pet tag would be cute....In my short black minidress with my pet tag ;) haahah cute <3 I like my necklace now its soo beautiful :) but I know anything master gets it will be cute..well not really master doesnt know cute -_- *cough*
Master told me today that my friend that i think is the prettiest most luckiest most hottest girl EVER is just ughh shes ok..
I was so worried..compared to this friend..I am a 2..xD just really blahh
but master called this girl average I don't even want to hear my rating =/
I wanted to change the subject to onew! (yeah first thing on my mind)
and he was like NO! WE CANT CHANGE IT TO ONEW! if you talk about onew ONE MORE TIME i WILL hang up..
At that momment I just felt he is willing to stop over onew..
he hurt me..
and my voice showed it..=/
I think he felt bad..
he was like "Kitty" *long dramatic puse*
and then "Katie" *longer dramatic pause*
and then "Kittie" *even longer dramatic pause*
^+^ I just laughed Master hurts me all the time I can bounce back quite easily!~
and he agreed to talk about onew but I shot him down ^_^ hehehe
we talked about our future together..I dont know why I like to think about the future.. so here is me and masters future :o

Location to live=CALIFORNIA
House insurance=BEST WE CAN GET FOR Earthquakes!~
House=Master picks (no hk pool)
Children Names= NO bible names,onew name, korean names but we can both pick :)
Wedding= Not what me and joppi planned X[ blahh
AHAHA :O jkjk anything goes I think <3 as long as I am with him I am ok..well MAYBE ill be ok..I deff wont live anywhere cold -_- nonono I want to show boobies


Master is the type of guy that loves me so much but shows it in the strangest ways..
the times where I think about his strange ways to show it is mostly when he sleeps or when he sends pictures..I just get this mushy feeling ^_O DOES THAT MEAN WHEN I SEE HIM IN REAL LIFE IM GOING TO LIKE WORSHIP HIM???!!!??
ahh..serving master will be so simple I think..if I feel this way over skype+pictures then real will be soo extremly WOAH just drop to my knees suck his cock kinda woah lol

Master to show he loves me..he screamed at me about going to china..
he screamed because he doesnt want anyone to hurt our relationship
and when I told him..he was scared and confused...
He really wasnt trying to be a asshole
and then the second time he showed love to me today :)
was when he let me be katie today just for today..he loved me enough to understand that for some reason I needed to feel like katie..Actually for a while I havent felt like anything..Just felt like a walking talking robot untill master comes online <3 my parents..they want me to be a robot..new parenting skills book ;) lol crazy..
and third time he showed love!~
When he became a crazy math teacher..his teaching style..it works but its just like UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH KILLL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
LOL mainly because I dont have a calculator =o how will I do long devision?? what about my exponents?? what about fractions??? noooooooo I WANT MY CALCULATOR =[
LOL and apart from not having a calculator its generally pretty hard concepts he is trying to install in my head concepts that he says he can do in his sleep backwords lol..when I get kids they won't go to school in america not in a kaziilion years :O even if it was private...But heyy I dont make choices in this relationship lol I kinda like not making choices? just Yes Master No Master BIG KISSY MASTER :)
master said if I score high on standard testing he will sing -TEN- onew songs -TEN- -TEN-
WOAH I WANT TO PICK OUT TEN ALREADY ^_^...
anyways Time to end blogging while master sleeps I am going to take a pratice exam :) I wont fail master..I will show him I can succeed and then enjoy my ten onew songs :) I have-one- shot at this testing.. lets just see how awesome I do..who knows maybe if i get like perfect score he will sing the WHOLE ONEW ALBUM!!!~ YAYYYY

Blahhzz WTF

today master just screamed at me =[
I told him I met this guy online
bassicly I enslave him and he gives me money ^_^
just like how master said I could do it
but this guy lives in china..he is a sucscfull CEO in china :o
and he has the diamond club account to prove it!
the diamond club just means your money has been verified :O
I just idely messaged him once and he happened to reply :D
he said its cool I like asian things and he has never tried being a slve and wants to try it~
we could get to know each other better and maybe in a few months he can fly me out to china on a private jet and he will let me stay in a suite I can bring a friend or two if i wish and we can try the bdsm things :D
cool right?
I told master..
and all he did was scream at me...
I felt like....I was a bad person....
just BLAH KITTY AWIFPJSFASK ASSPKFNA;N;AS FSAKMAFS;M KA;AM;KFM;ASMF
aghh....=/
I didnt know just messaging someone was so harmfull...
I followed the rules...no personal relationships just bdsm
but still I was screamed at =[
=[
its my first time really being screamed at by master
I feel sick..
I just told master i am going to eat
I shall order chowmein..
and sleep....sleep forever
ughh i hope i dont awake for a long time -_-
I waited to talk to master for a longgg time
but I didnt even get to tell master other things in my life..
he was just screaming at me..
and when he did give me the chance to talk about other things
I didnt want to tell him?
it just felt like he wouldnt really listen..
I know most times master doesnt listen but it just felt like he wouldnt care really
just blahhhh hes so mad at me
what do i do? ~_~
aghhh I need chowmeins...
aghh talking to master is so weird now
it was just ONE message not even exchanging anything else =/
Master asked what if he went to germany with a stranger?
I wanted to ask him whats the diffrence from germany and where he lives?
no matter what master will fuck someone thats not me
should I feel upset that he wants to go to germany?
should I feel like a bad person for messaging someone???

~1

I feel bad that my friend joppi has confused feelings about Master XD
she knows everything about our relationship except she doesnt know the bdsm part?
As of right now she thinks master is the perfect boyfriend for me <3
I describe our relationship more as a DATING rather then a slavery relationship..

"Oppa told me that he loves me forever!~ and will never ever ever let me go not in a thousand kazillion years :O because I stole his heart with my cuteness :D"
(OF COURSE master did not say this) and then she is like AHH!~~HE LOVES YOU <3 THATS CUTE~! Did I stretch the truth? no..Master did tel me he would never let me go but there was conditions to him never leaving me..
or something else would be like
"Oppa says, the name Katie is really special to him and years from now he wants to name something really special Katie like his first child or his first resturant or something :)"
Well...mmmm I am named katie and I am his first slave? Slave and reasturant isnt a far stretch I serve master just like reasturants serve food?
"Today Oppa said he wants our realationship to be high intensity! meaning he wants me to know that He loves me so much and he will do his best to make me happy in the future!~ even though we are online he wants to make sure we dont fail like others relationships and we are being real and legit 100% of the way"
Well..our relationship is a high intesnsity bdsm relationship and we are trying to be a Master slave realtionship not a fake master sub relationship..Legit and real

Although I love stretching the truth about what master says I enjoy stretching the truth about what I say to him lol
Situation: Me and Master are in a fight rawrrr

Kitty says: Oppa, there is 3billion people in china..If you don't treat me better I will move to china!~~
Oppa says: Sorry Kitty, don't move to china I love you!~ I will try my best not to hurt you anymore

Actual argument
Kitty says: Oppa, You always hurt me I am sick of it
Master says: Sorry Kitty, I will do my best to cut down on unintentional hurting you but you must realize that sometimes intentional hurting is required in this relationship

^_^ TBH I like my version of the argument better <3 so sappy

Bassicly I quote my favoriate asian dramaas :) and now master looks like the best boyfriend ever but Theirs aalso times where I dont stretch..if master says anything G rated that doesnt need stretching to make it more G-rated then I let joppi know the truth :) but how often is master G-Rated? Heres what I figure...Joppi is going to hate Master soon might as well make her love master just as much as I do? <3

wahhzz

yayy!~ diet is going great I look good :O
MASTERS BIRTHDAY IS IN TWO WEEKS
AHHHH~~~ FRANTIC DASH TO FIND OUT WHAT TO GIVE HIM
I finished mudkips ^_^
but I dont like mudkips..
so now I can A. REDO MUDKIPS B.DESTROY MUDKIPS OR C.SEND MUDKIPS
-_- I think I will go with B. it just looks meh...
I want master to get something and be like
YAYYYYYY MY KITTY LOVES ME!~~
But I dont know what to give Master :O
What if I get something too girly 0_0
what if i buy a tshirt and he hates it
rawrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I want master to be super happy with what he gets
Happy enough to go on facebook and be like.. Great Birthday today love my special gift :p
hahha jkjk master isnt so public about kitty
I Wish Master was more public in a secret way :D
Like this one time master put my text on facebook~~ ahhh so cute
copycat I couldve sued him for copywrite issues but since I am so NICE I let him get away with it this time ;)
Master said he does not know how to give me surprices
ahh how is master so slow
To me Master can make me so happy by the simplest of things
A picture of him makes me jump up and down ^_^ It's emberassing to say lol
and if by chance...I recieve a picture and I am in bed I giggle like a little girl who just heard that her crush likes her back LOL
The crazy part of this is I usually get pictures when I am FIREY MAD at master lol
tsk tsk tsk master cheats by making kitty feel better with a picture lol
Master asked me if I could go back in time and pick a OPPA for a Master would I?
I thought about it for a little bit
and then master asked me whats special about him
I thought for a long long long long time
nothing really is special about Master He is good at math,writes well, geeky, weird? idk nothing I really care about enough to mark as special and its a LONG stretch to call Master unique since unique I dont believe in...
But Master is special because he grew into a special soft place of my heart made just for him!~~
Yeah..I know sounds like a cop out answer...lOL but its true
If joppi hurt me a lot and then sent me a picture
I would defriend her on facebook
appologies are not made by pictures..I dont forget what happens because you sent me a picture -_- But master As soon as he sends me a picture its like he put a bandaid over my broken heart and kissed it with love <3 I just get that lovelly amazing Feeling and just think Ahh..I am not mad anymore ^_^ but thats just photos
When my phone rings and its master..AHHHHHH I HAVE A HART ATTACK~!
lol should I say hello super sexy? nono I will say hello super cool
nonno I will say hello like a slave! NONONONO I WILL SAY HELLO I LOVE YOU OPPA!!~~
haha but by the time I pick up..I get so confused on which hello that I just sound confused (-_-) fail the list of special things he does to me can go on for a long time and maybe one day I shall post all of them ha
but back to the point...Master or Oppa who is a Master...
I pick Master Oppa Master might be great! I can really see myself having lots of fun and not being hurt and enjoying myself!!!! but Unfortunatly There is only one place in my heart for someone like Master I dont think Oppa Master will be able to get into that place to get in..
1.You need to hurt me
2. to make me WANT this relationship
3. make me WANT to not give up

Master The first time he hurt me thats when he started cracking into a special place in my heart..He told me If I am not serious about bdsm we should end this I was so hurt I cried I cried and cried he said bdsm was a phase for me thats when I wanted to not give up (see haru haru)
The first time Master made me want to keep this relationship was when he described what love is, the special feeling of love he will have for his slave me~!
The first time he hurt me..Was less then a week of starting this relationship -_-
In fact its my -SECOND- blog post! I guess that shouldve been a hint that he would hurt me more often lol

I was in a BDSM relationship with a master 95% Oppa :o
When I called..He wouldnt say hello
He would say " I love you"
If we happened to talk about anything He will always squeeze I love you into it
" Today I was at the mall, I was looking for clothes and then I saw the perfect dress and I thought God I really love Katie I Know she will love this on me"
XD even if he was talking about facebook he would say I love you
Your my angel, Your so beautiful I want to spend my life with you!~~
cute things!~ copied from dramas that I pretended I never watched lol
and one day he proposed! A promise ring, it was beautiful my name was engraved into it and it was really nice..
after I aceepted though things got weird..
I wasnt ready for kids!!
and He was intrested in poly dating 3 or 4 wives of course im the most beautiful angel He has..He wants a Black angel, Spanish angel, White angel and a Asian angel..Sounds more like he wants to TASTE the rainbow -__-
and we broke off I kept the ring ^_^
I sold it lol beautiful ring I hope whoever gets that ring
Is happy and in love
but the feeling I have for Master and the feeling I had for him was diffrent..
Yea he could make me smile by saying I love you..But Master makes me squeel and fangirl when he says I love you :O Yea he looked good shirtless AWESOME CHOCOLATE ABS LIKE KPOP STARS but Master Shirtless looks like OMGDANFJDSAFDSNLKJFNLDSGSDKJG oops thats not a word :p thats because I cant describe how I feel
The best way to describe why I will pick Master everytime and continue to be in a painful unfair relationship is because
I am addicted to the way master makes me feel?
With Master all my emotions are like on crack ^_^ JUST CRAZILY HYPERLY OVERDONE
With Master I am 10x more HAPPY ^_^ EVERYDAYY
When Master hurts me though it hurts a bit more then others..
I take his advice and critism a lot harder then others for exsample I will NEVER use a comma without a space ever again lol
I also atleast attempt to look at what i type and see how can I make this have less words :D
clearly I dont do that on blogs..Blogs are me putting my heart on a page!
If Master fucks other girls I will be hurt, But..I wont show it ^_^
I will happily search for more girls..
I want to be a slave because I want to make one person happy,as happy as can be I can't die without knowing one person truley was so happy because of me :)this "happiness spreader" can be done in many ways..but why did I chose bdsm?
I love truth or dare
I loved dare the most~
And I found I was a good slave..
Never had complaints before
I really wanted a master with a weird fetish that is hard for people to do?
so I guess in terms of expirence I DONT have much
but in terms of expirence I have had my fair share
ranging from A baby..To a Doll that cant move,eat,drink etc.
Masters bimbo ideas falls in the middle
Maybe what if master doesnt need a bimbo to get it up
but he needs a nonphsyical element that his soul is attracted to?
how creepy do I sound?? lol
Like what if...his brain is looking for a girl that is not just pretty with boobies but also special unlike anyone else?
When I Concider the possiablity that maybe a bimbo might not make him attracted..I worry If I will be the special element is brain is searching for to keep him up :o?
I do have a solution to all Masters troubles!
Just one month will cure him for a LIFETIME 100% MONEYBACK GURANTEE :D
haah I hope we dont have to get to such extremes lol

Twistedz

I am so humiliated
I just want someone to hug me and tell me its ok..
I wish I had a boyfriend :/
I spent 2days of my life with webdesign things..
I thought I had skill!
I worked slow but it looked nice
But now when I finished the site it looked average
Did I really spend so much time
To make shit?
I spent so much time..skipped so many meals...
But I have nothing to show again..
I really wanted to proudly show master!
And master will smile and honnestly tell me its not garbage..
Master tells me a lot of the things I like or I write is garbage..
I don't know why I expected this to be diffrent
Its like my 4.0 gpa I achieved with all B's
Why am I so average :/
I prepared a huge surprise for master 2 days ago!
it took me a while but it was perfect!
So much retakes and retrys
My voice hurt so much from redoing..
Master said he would be home soon he said this at 10pm
I waited till 3:30am for master..
Worried, excited and anxious..
But at 3:30Am when I went to sleep I felt alone, confused and sad
BUT I was hopeful that master prob went to a strip club :) and it ends at 4:30am
The next day I found out master actually was home the whole time
But frogot about me
As soon as I heard I was pissed and sad and dissapointed
I worked so hard on this for him..
I just deleated everything I made -_-
If he can't remember kitty was waiting for him he shouldn't get the surprice
That surpice belongs to someone who actually cares
If I was a hot bimbo waiting for him at home he wouldn't have frogot!
If I was anyone...but kitty he would have rememberd
I told master its cool I understand etc.
And the pictures helped a lot
But, it will still take some time...
In the meantime I guess ill figure out what to do with my webdesign :/

Ne-Yo

Master asked kitty to pick a song that describes her love for him Master picked a bright fun song but then kitty picked a sad song with suicide at the end..even thou the end is sad it displayed kittys emotions..I nervously sent him the link it felt like I was asking someone out for the first time wondering if he will accept my feelings..Master did not accept my feelings he was like AUGHHHH WHY DO YOU SEND ME A SAD SONG and he said this is crap..and he just hated the song I felt rejected I felt like screaming and crying and hiding under my bed..Master tryed to explain but I couldnt read it..I read it and then didnt want to read so I just sumarized..It was too late I was rejected by my master for having strong emotions that scared him..I shouldnt have strong emotions I should stop..He doesnt even love me yet I can't even be introduced propperly yet I need to weaken my emotions..After the song master got sad because he thinks I am sad being with him and he has a problem with boobies..Master does have a problem with boobies but that's the only way he sees himself happy before I continue here is the song

Jo Gyu Mahn-I'll give you everything
Normal=lyrics
Bold=My emotions behind

I could never see why you would ever meet me
Thats why I cant open my eyes
If I open my eyes you might disapear, this might all be a dream
I'm so grateful you came to me
I am so lucky you came into my life
Were you lonely all this time
Were you alone waiting for someone to open up your hear
I can guess by your thin face
Freshmen year Master lost a lot of weight and was depressed
Cry when you feel like it
It's ok to cry you dont have to be strong in front of me
get rid of your pain with your tears
Cry untill all your pain is gone I don't mind
In my arms we should soothe each others pain
Together as we grow together we will soothe each other pains you don't have to do it alone anymore
I may not be good enough
Right now I am not good enough for Master,I can't proudly be displaced and our relationship wont be accepted
But I will give you the rest of my love
Right now even though I am not good enough I will give you all the love I have right now
Were you tired all this time?
Were you tired of finding someone you can open your hear to?
I may not be good enough but I will give you everything

I wanted a song with our past and future..Master talks about past and future a lot..this song talks a lot about how hard it has been to find someone a tired lonely road..Master says he lives in fear sometimes living in fear can be lonely trying so hard to help everyone and master couldn't open his heart up to a lot of people but kitty can see some of masters heart...a lyric that seems like it won't fit master is " your face looks thin" but it fits! Master was alone the first year in the usa and he lost a lot of weight hating the food here but the lyric that ties this whole song into why I picked this was " Right now I may not be good enought but I will give you the rest of my love" I feel this not good enough emotion a lot!
Wtf is master doing dating me..having me as his kitty????
1. I am not chinese
2.I am not beautiful like everyone else on cm..or on his fb
3. I don't have big boobies
4.Age issues causes emberassment to master
5.I am not at the same intellegance level..
I am below average and if master searched harder he can find people that fits all his criteria!
But he won't ever find a kitty like me..a kitty with plane emails who is always posotive(ish) loves asian culture! And more!~
I can't give him looks, beauty or his friends jealous of me..I can give him love :) All the love I can send!~~~~~~~~
When I get big boobies I can't wait for master to say I love you :D
Master said today..kitty I truely love you..does he love me without boobies
Master said without big FF boobies I am only worthy of a fuck or two and maybe one date
Even though I am worth that much to master sexually I will do my best tim improve so overtime I can be of more worth :)
I hope one day..master can look at me without thinking about boobies or boobies in the future..just look at me and my personality and see that I am not so bad and that he loved me a lot more then he thought..
When master worries about me and family situations It makes me feel like he cares more and more about me each passing day!~
So lame to think that way..