Slipery Slidez

I used to view Master as someone who sticks closly to his beliefs, but yesterday I found out thats not the case!
I asked Master what he thought about clubs back in November, he told me something I would never froget!~
"Clubs are disgusting, it is a place for sleezy people to to get sleezy dates, I hate clubs, I wont attend a club I am not as low as some people who get drunk to go to a club to bring a girl home"
he was disgusted about clubs and thought about clubbing in a negative light
but when his friends suggusted to go clubbing, he quickly agreed!~
What does that say about Master?
I have many turnoffs, this being one of them.. I like guys who are not afraid to stand up for what they believe in, even if they happen to be standing alone...
But, I am not going to make the clubbing incident surprice me, I already knew Master doesnt stand up for what he beieves in, he is controlled by his friends....

Master wanted me to do a report!
a report to include in his flawless 200 page report about schools...
The more I wrote, the less confident I was..
My report is going to be the dead weight
I really should not do it...
I have 2 drafts of my report..both done in two seperate ways
but, I guess I am not as great as Master..
even after reading the book on writing, my writing seems bad..
It's not fair..
instead of dwelling on the deadweightness of my report..
Master said I could do the report ANY way I wanted..
so, I decided to do the essays for each school..
I deciced to write essays for schools compared to just saying WHY i want to go to xyz schools because
writing the essay shows I am dedicated to applying, and wish to go..
Maybe, I am just adding more work for master XD
Essays are all I can do to help him..
I feel ashamed and emberased that I cant do anything for him..
I hate when Master says he likes having smart friends
it just reminds me that I am not excactly his type..
I always knew I wasnt his type, but I enjoy not thinking about it?
I miss the kind of BDSM relationships I had where I was everything my Master ever wanted, the bestest thing he could wish for..
With Master, I am the bestest thing he could wish for (an awesome slave), but I still need to push for more..
but, that push to be better, that push so succeed is not a bad thing it is a posotive influence, one that I enjoy!~




I want to see Master..I want to see him on August 26-August 28th!
I'll have enough money to see him! and just a little bit extra for fun!
But, Idk..I prob wont have enough money for us to go out to dinner ^_^
but who needs to buy thai when chowmein packets exsists??? ^+^
duhhz get a clue :)
On August 26th..We can eat Chowmein and chicken! ill do the chowmein and oppa does chicken~!
and thenn August 27th...mmmm Oppa can make soup ^_^ but...idk...
nononono we can eat SUSHI ^_^ chicken sushi :) we can use the chicken from yesterday to make yummy chicken sushi :)
I guess my point is..you dont really need a lot of money to have fun?
I will have fun having sex, playing videogames and watching master <3 my chowmeinzzz yayyzzz
I pick August 26-28th because my parents will be going to newyork!
they leave august 25th at 11:30am and come back august 29th at 11:54Pm ^_^
So picking 26-28th is just perfect <3
plus my twin brother wants to sleepover at his girlfriends house, so we are both covering for each other :P
Master goes back to school next week wensday the 24th..That week will be lots of homework for him..
But, me coming doesnt get in the way!
I leave sunday MORNING ^_^ and come friday NIGHT
meaning...he has all day sunday to do homework and all afternoon friday to do homework?
and if he wishes to do homework satuday, thats fine!~ me+Rossy can play games :D '
or maybe..he can do homework while I suck his cock? ^_^
pratice makes perfect!~!
I haven't excactly mentioned this idea to Master yet...
He is in class...but after class ends, after he is done resting, after he is done eating...then I will ask him about it...
but I am scared of karma?
everytime karma screws us over >_< ahzzzz
why can't I meet the person I want to see the mostest!~
nono I will deff meet him this time <3
I wonder what a kiss feels like?
I wonder how his warm hug will feel?
I wonder...what it feels like to cuddle?
all these things I wonder makes me giggle  like a little schoolgirl..
am I so unexpirenced? xD
I want to eat chowmein on the patio, looking at the stars cuddling under a blanket...
I want to take soo many picturez with his super expensive camera..
I know, he wont ever post these pictures on facebook..but, I still want to take them memories of that perfect night <3

The more I think about seeing him next week, the more worried I get about myself..
Ahh...I am breaking out..
mm..I wish my teeth were whiter..
ahhzz what if my hair is too short...
what if he doesnt like the way my hair feels?
what if my legs are too gross?
what if my stretch marks disgust him?
what if...I am too fat?
what if..he isnt the person he said he is?
what if he does drugs?
what if he has a pet snake?
what if he doesnt like me?
what if...........................
lol it goes on forever ^_^
actually..Master rates girls all the times, but I never ask him ro rate me lol
if the ranking is too high then its rigged if the ranking is too low then I am not suitable >_<
I wish I was super hot...
coming to meet him  is not the problem, it is almost flawless plan..every X variable has been covered and every Y variable has been covered..even the random Z variable is secured..but
now the problem is  just confidence..am I confident enough to go looking like this?
am I confident enough to go knowing I am not the type of person he wishes to kiss?