Dragon

AhhzzI
Today while writing my eight page report for Master that he requested...
So I called up one of the schools I wanted to apply to and asked a couple questions!
after asking some questions, I was told that I was not eligable for admission..
and I should try again next year..
But, I thought they were joking so I just continued writing my paper happily
after my paper finished, I researched online, and its true I really was not eligable..
I felt 2 things
1. Pain- ahz I really wanted to get into this school but now all I did was screw myself over..
2. Regret- I just wasted Masters time, I am so stupid for allowing him to waste his precious time..
I expected Master to scream at me at my stupidness regarding allowing him to waste his time..
but instead he scremed at me for believing I could not get in..
how can he transfrom from cute and cuddly to angry dragon so quickly?
o_o I just told him that this is what the website says, and this is what the person said
so that means I am not eligable
then he just IMPLODE o_o exceptions count, exceptions to every rule..
they view your application as a whole..
did Master did lots of research, he must know that these schools recive MANY applicants..
to be even concidered my chances rest at 1%..
Master believes I can do anything, but I dont believe in myself as much as he does...
I really, really, really ,really have to do well to make up for not being eligable..
I wish, just for one day Master would sit down and "Look at my application"
see that in black and white it really is just an average joe, not whats in his head..
yes! I have 500 community service hours! but..all of them are from one source being a secretary at my dads job..yea not medical related XD
maybe ill just declare my major undecided so they wont mind that I have 500 service hours from a trucking company lol
it's too late to get hours elsewhere, but on the bright side! I can get more hours from this trucking company..
I heard it is better to have service hours in one spot..
Master got so mad..but he does not understand the risk..
If I dont get into a school in california, we will be distance again..
I was looking forward to moving to get closer to him!
but, because of my stupidity I might have just added more distance..
even if master said he would move closer, I would be sad...
Master loves more then anyone his brother..
annd I would love for him to atleast be in the same state as his brother!~
The schools around his brother, are pretty stiff competition..lol
but, it never hurts to try!~
A risk is losing something..
what if the risk is losing someone?
I just want to be closer to master, for master to be happy with me..
happy with his brother, happy with his llife, happy fucking other girls..
and one day when he is watching the sun set...he will sit down and think
"wow, my life is just perfect"
I want Master to have a great life, in california close to his brother...
close to many other asians for him to communicate with...
in a place where gays lez and trannys are ok.
a place where he can express himself without fear..
if I told master, he wouldnt listen to me for a second..
maybe just laugh at the idea that the risk is a person..not an actual object..
Master said he applied to 33 schools, his brother applied to around 50..
Unlike Master I cant afford to apply to that many schools o_o
the most I could afford is 12..
and of that 12, 9 are in California
leaving me 3 more schools left..
applying to schools I am not eligable for is such a gamble with only 12 schools and the pressure to want master to be happy..
I tryed to convince master to just abandon ship on some UC schools, but he wouldnt listen..and I was kinda scared...
but, Master is right I can't give up..
if I believe I can't do it then I already can't do it..
why is Master so inspring ?
ahhz..hes like the best...
why does he inspire me so easily...
why does he mold me in so many ways?
physically, mentally and emotionally...
ahh I want to cry 10 million thosand tears!~
tears of happiness ^_^
I've found someone that inspires me more then onew :)
(don't worry onew I still llike you ^_^)
onew is just so inspiring..he always cheers people up with chicken :)
dubdubdudbdudbu onew!~
I am going to start believing in myself..and start working harder..
I only have 40 words memorized...
need to start working harder..I can do this..
exceptions exsist, but even if exceptions dont exsist
wherever I end up..I'll follow with a smile because Master and I will begin our life together!~
Whoever is my roomate, really is lucky...
they can bring home guys every weekend if they wish ;)
I'll be spending my weekends at Masters house.. hehehehehe
sexsexsexsexsex
In fact, I happen to be popping my cheery next friday :)
Master plans on taking me to the doctor for birth control pills..
but...I dont like when Master pays for things
I know I should get used to it since I wont have any money..
but, its not like it is my money that is buying the items..
it's -Masters- money
and thats where I have a problem..
I can't really say where I think his money should go towards since it is his money
but, I feel like when he spends his money on me he is wasting it..he could be spending on cuckquean sluts or hookers..or a fleshlight or something..idk
Master applyed to 33 schools, that is just a luxary...a heaven of saftey..one of those 33 schools will accept him..his brother applied to 50+...they both expirenced luxary..
lol I can't expirence luxary like Master, but rather stress? ahh what if xyz doesnt accept me so I have to continue going to my crappy school?
Master when I told him I did not want to apply to all 9 schools too much risk, he told me he would pay for it..
I wanted to protest, but I was scared?
ok..Master scares me..
BUT THATS ONLY BECAUSE HES SCARY..
I swear....he gets all RAWR and then I just imagine his eyes changing...and then he looks like a dragon...and then he gets calm and then sudden rawr..its scary...
I will apply for schools I can afford..all other schools I will not apply too
and that is currently just 12 schools...9 in california and 3 elsewhere..it's scary since those 9 schools I am uneligable for...
but, no way will I ever, ever ever want to use Masters money..
so what I will do is..study my ass off and make sure I become someone that a university will want ;)